What am doing here? have you read a whole book? Harry Wormwood: This child doesn't have a "thingie" . Jack and Jill went up the hill As long as you enjoyed the cake. Matilda turns around and carrot is facing her. See! Hup, two, four, free. [Jenny enters Ms. Trunchbull's office and almost get struck by a dart]. Where is the maggot known as Nigel? Is it some modern miracle of calculus Harry Wormwood: Agatha Trunchbull: MATILDA We cannot simply place her in the top form with the eleven-year-olds. We don't want to burst a blood vessel on your first day. But it's a truth empirical. If,1,null Matilda Pick Up Lines. And I say that criminals like you are not full until you have eaten the entire cake. This little girl needs somebody strong to fight by her side. Look, Miss Snit, a girl does not get anywhere by acting intelligent! MATILDA MISS HONEY. it isn't fair! And children in the bottom class aren't really expected to read. MATILDA But the one thing . (Starts to go, but really this time) I'm going to put the newt in Trunchbull's jug! Every new life It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me. Now sit up and look at the TV. I'm in the zone, doll! Matilda? AAAHH! Can't you sell good cars, Dad? [hands Michael the cookies] One day Jen, you'll see that everything I do is for your own good. Mrs. Wormwood: I always compete, doctor. No, but don't people need good cars? Than the volume with which what you don't know's expressed. FBI Agent Bob: I believe that . Matilda: MRS WORMWOOD and RUDOLPHO No! Was it magic? DOCTOR BIG KID [BEN] On a boat, in a car, with your toes all curled - Oh, the places we'll go when I rock your world. Harry Wormwood, owner, founder, whatever. But learning a language is over the top . But here it is, coming true: One second, Dad. Have a marshmallow. Michael: CHILDREN 1 MATILDA [looking at a portrait of her father] Tricks!" Besides, even if you didn't do it, I'm going to punish you, because I'm big and you're small, I'm right and you're wrong, and there's nothing you can do about it! Just because you find that life's not fair, it Mustn't let a little thing like "little" stop you. celebrities! The first car your brilliant father sold cost $320. Narrator: We can have our cake and it it too! But I didn't do anything. MISS TRUNCHBULL Look what you've done, you stupid woman. MR WORMWOODOh, my good Lord. Come on! Then after several seconds, he picks it up and returns to the cake with renewed vigour. MR WORMWOODLook what I've just found! [walks into the dining room and looks in the mirror] . [appalled at Zinnia talking with FBI agents Bill and Bob] RG0 MRS WORMWOOD The CHILDREN and BIG KIDS step back, leaving AMANDA in a spotlight. A bell rings. Matilda: And my very favorite is a spoonful of Nutella. Miss Honey: You're the spitting image. Pokemon Pick Up Lines. BIG KIDS Matilda turns around and carrot is facing her. google_ad_format="120x90_0ads_al_s"; Then your mummy is a twit! You gotta be loud! Mrs. So he invited the mother's stepsister to come and live with him. Mr. Wormwood. If you want to throw the hammer for your country, You Overall, the best pickup line is one that is creative and original. Girl, you've gotta learn to stand up and stick out from the [She exits down the steps and stops behind the first portion of the audience.] He's fantastic! Jenny: MRS WORMWOOD Are you smoking a cigarette? So go and put some highlights in your hair. Five times two is ten. COUPLE 3 The CHILDREN thrash in their seats. You shall be destroyed. A brand new human being! Sell me a lemon? I don't want another one. 10. [the Trunchbull's car, sold to her by Harry Wormwood, has broken down, forcing her to haul it all the way back to her house]. [She flicks on the light of the vanity in her parent's bathroom, which has risen from the stage. Everyone is born, but not everyone is born the same. In the world of lame pick-up lines, corny phrases, and straight-out catcalling, there's one form of getting noticed that's neither flimsy nor stupid. Just write. [she lunges the ball at the door, ultimately puncturing it immensely]. Trivia A little less dressing like your mum. Sometimes you have to be a little bit naughty! The cook enters, holding an enormous chocolate cake on a tray, along with a wooden spoon. Knock on the door, Jenny. [throwing marshmallows as Matilda was grabbing the book that was thrown] He had meant to say, "When a child is bad." I mean, I know you say you didn't, but obviously, you did. I'm sure you'd , MR WORMWOOD Look at him go! The most common thing in life is life . . RUDOLPHO enters from behind a gap in the curtain behind her. I've got a whole house to look after! Piacelli. Matilda : I thought grown-ups weren't afraid of anything. You've gotta learn to listen up, kid. You chose books - I chose looks. . What do you want a book for? A fool? MATILDA [noticing her books] And if it's not right, My daddy says I'm his special little guy! AAAAAAAHHHH! So, erm . What've you done with his fingie? RUDOLPHO MR WORMWOOD If you are having fun, you are not learning. . Okay! MISS HONEY [snatching the book from Matilda and tears the pages out of the cover]. Quite the contrary. Zinnia Wormwood: . Neigh! COUPLES MRS WORMWOOD Agatha Trunchbull: Ever since the day doc chopped the umbilical cord, [Jenny knocks on Ms. Trunchbull's door] MISS HONEY This boy, Bruce Bogtrotter, is none other than a vicious sneak thief! The guy with the stupid haircut! Get on with it. Oh, my good Lord! MISS TRUNCHBULL walks heavily toward the coats. Harry Wormwood: He stands up on a block. "Hi, My Name Is [insert name]." I'd say this one is the number one pick-up line of all time. Look. . Nicholas Nickleby . Above average is average. You're being pathetic! Come on, move you piece of junkyard fodder! It's going to be brilliant! Mr Wormwood! [insulted] Do all those brains in your head give you a headache? It was like the entire world went silent for that Green hair? Students: I'll come in there and pound your miserable hide! Harry Wormwood: And I will teach you a thing or two. Eventually, they quieten down, but LAVENDER continues to jump up in down next to MATILDA, who is reading. [Matilda comes home from school, excitedly. She's got no respect, that one. You chose books. BIG KIDS and CHILDREN And do you tell them lots of stories like you do with me? Connections I will not say anymore! I need to talk to SOMEBODY besides our stupid kids! Here in the library again, are we? I can be a soldier. Bruce Bogtrotter: [pointing her riding crop at Amanda] But it's a truth empirical She just picked him up, swung him around, and threw him out the . It's just pathetic! This is the cottage from your story! Of course you didn't do it, you little twit! 9. A poem? My name is Miss Honey. You'll be punished so seVerely if you step out of line. I'm never wrong! The table stops and the hands hit the ground. Ahh! With your stupid books and your stupid reading. pregnant! Mr. Wormwood: Apply just one simple rule My mummy says I'm a miracle, MISS HONEYbeckons MATILDA to the back of the class. 1 0 obj Brand new stock, sir! Her father was a doctor, and he needed someone to look after things at home. [He stomps and crouches on the floor, pulling at his hat and making sounds of exertion. . CHILDREN 2 ERIC, TOMMY, and BRUCE endobj Now EAT IT! We can have our cake and eat it , Ah-ah-aah-ah Where's his fingie? Dip face! To stand up and be proud! Dance competition's over. I'm not paying it. Over the course of the song, she writes on the board: "Copy one million times by tomorrow. Mrs. Wormwood: Whether you like it or not. You just need to keep your feet inside the line. MISS HONEY enters and erases the board. YoU listen here, my dear, A table with the word "Contest" emblazoned on the side is wheeled in. . You will soon see there's no escaping tragedy. Well, take another! [into recorder] 3 0 obj And honestly, I was really, definitely, sort of, almost thinking about owning up. . That lady? Stuff it in. You have to put it right . Past Alice. I live in a cage, Harry! . A little less shh, a lot more schwing. Ow! I'm gonna take that no-good jalopy you sold me and shove it up your bazooga! [She takes a mirror from the armchair.] All right! Go fig-ueur! And yet, every single life, The Wormwoods laugh. For this newt, you piss-worm! Pizza is my second favorite thing that I eat in bed. What? Somewhere along the way, my dear, [tosses the cereal in the air] I'm the best! For those idiots out there who don't know how to play, here's how it goes. MAN: Have you seen his school report? But that's not fair! Well, this isn't my room at all! Did we sell some cars today, honeydew? MRS PHELPS enters. Who you been talking to? I have a nice house, a wonderful husband and you are slaving away teaching snot-nosed children their ABCs. MISS TRUNCHBULL MATILDA and ACROBAT [off stage] Is it time for school yet, mum? Stupid, nasty, stinking, slimy . I can't find his frank 'n' beans! I don't want any, thank you. A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X. CHILDREN I'm not crying because it's sad. Matilda quotes are certainly quotable for movie fans. I've had them since I was big enough to Xerox. That I treated the rules with casual disdain? CHILDREN Of course! Innocent victims of their story. Check it if you don't believe me. RUDOLPHO Creep on back to that library of yours or something. Every new life How could she possibly have done it when she was sitting way over here? What? They are good runners, sir. [She turns the screens back on.]. ALL COUPLES: What? And so you think you're able Harry Wormwood: Matilda: . Well done, Bogtrotter. 'Cause your life as you know it is "aitcH"-ent history. . If you want to throw the hammer for your country. It was the age of wisdom . I slave all day, and you're entertaining a couple of surfer dude bodybuilders! Okay. No one's gonna care if you don't care, I might have known. That's all right, Jenny. Any children who object will go straight into the Chokey together! You see, the Trunchbull's cake was so good that I'd scoffed it down too quick, and now it was beginning to fight back. Ah-ah-aah-ah DOCTOR My daddy says I'm his special little guy. It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me. And worst of all, when the girl was five, her father died. Yes. What? Honest. Every life I bring into this world You can't. He's part Italian, you know. The more you'll just look like a fool. MISS TRUNCHBULL RUDOLPHO saunters over and holds his arm out to MISS HONEY. Cause I had to slow down to take a second look at you. You? (Bruce!) We have everything . You make money? MISS HONEY, BIG KIDS, and CHILDREN And this . Anyone with a good sense of humor will appreciate them. Mrs. Wormwood: Look at mummy. . Do you think I faltered or amended my rotation? So they say. . I am GUILTYwhen the Headmistress says I am GUILTY.". Two times two is four. Russian businessmen: very, very stupid! Matilda's teacher? . But the "tomato" is a very good word. To the rules. ". "I have a pen, you have a phone number. Don't just stand there like a wet tissue. I'm not guilty! Yes. Listen, you little wiseacre: I'm smart, you're dumb; I'm big, you're little; I'm right, you're wrong, and there's nothing you can do about it. I can see we're not going to agree, are we? MATILDA They then saunter off. She found a small cottage. Ooh, me, me, me, miss! She'll call a truce, Bruce. Back before my life had eNded, LAVENDER MISS TRUNCHBULL [cutting off Harry's hat with scissors] . Trunchbull: The scene freezes again for BRUCE to talk. MISS TRUNCHBULL BRUCE turns around and burps for a full ten seconds. Did I let myself go. MRS WORMWOOD Mustn't let a little thing like "little" stop you. What's wrong with me? Why would she want some snotty, disobedient kid? Amanda Thripp: [She throws the baton across the stage, does a jet to catch it, and points her finger at MISS HONEY.] I think in effect, We have everything . There's never been a miracle, a miracle, a miracle Where did you get those? I don't know. It's the mileage. And . From the grunt I had practiced for many a month? You gotta give yourself permission to shine. MISS HONEY faces the audience and raises her fist. [talks to the woman librarian] Yeah. NIGEL leans forward in concentration and groans in agony several times. ;)Don't forget to SUBSCRIBE to our. Erm, well, as you know, Matilda is in the bottom class. Hmm. Great, big, strong, scary woman she is. The stage goes black. Might she be a little brighter than her class? [after listing prices of cars bought and sold]. My, my, that is good. CHILDREN LAVENDER puts the wooden spoon back in his hand. DOCTOR NIGEL runs in up the steps stage left, screaming. You oughtn't blame yourself now, come along. And please don't say "the gym.". Agatha Trunchbull: So give me more cake! Even if you're little, you can do a lot. She exits, not before scratching her behind and wiping her nose. The end is happier. [after smashing the entire cake platter over Bruce Bogtrotter's head, causing the children to stop cheering] [She stands and approaches MISS HONEY menacingly, towering over her.] DOCTOR Harry Wormwood: [She grabs a baton with a yellow ribbon attached to it and starts twirling to the music.] MR WORMWOOD takes a mirror that MRS WORMWOOD brandishes. What do you think might be the cause of this? It's not mine! Glad I never was one. You're getting on a plane, Mrs Wormwood? Hmm. MATILDA . Mrs Wormwood, do you really have no idea? Doesn't mean that you just have to grin and bear it. MATILDA [He rips the towel off to reveal that his hair is green.] (Bruce!) No way! Wait, Dad, you're going too fast. Bruce! The endings are often a little bit gory! How does that sound? Do you think you could tell me what two times twenty-eight is? MISS HONEY DOCTOR Content has never been less important, so Harry Wormwood: Bruce! What? His whatchamacallit. I can feel it in my hips. BRUCE . have you read a whole book? And then, my great, big, beautiful chocolate-y burp, which now seemed to have a mind of its own, wafted full into the face of the Trunchbull! [She underlines the sentence on the board.]. What do I have to do to gain respect around here? and . Forgotten, by everyone except, that is [She pulls her coat over her head.] After your first day of school! Used to compete in the Olympics, throwing the hammer! Psst! She puts it down on the desk behind BRUCE. [He pulls the towel over his head and starts massaging vigorously]. She holds up the final "10". google_color_text="5F6A72"; Right. But I . Mrs. D? This uncorrupted mind. That's not fair! BIG KIDS and CHILDREN run off. Think about what you want to say, and then say it in a creative, original way. If you sit around and let them get on top, you [She gets on all fours as RUDOLPHO rides her like a horse.] Desks rise from the ground and a blackboard makes its way from the back of the stage. A large iron gate made of square holes of various sizes rolls in from both sides of the stage. MR WORMWOOD paces the stage. These are some of the best quotes from the fantasy family film Matilda as determined by you and your votes. RUDOLPHO a contract. Smile for mother! It was like the entire world had gathered to see The Burning Woman, Hurling Through the Air, with Dynamite in Her Hair, Over Sharks and Spiky Objects, Caught By the Man Locked in a Cage. | He screams and turns around, hitting ERIC's cap against ERIC's desk. Does that mean I can get that new TV? That's the main thing. Dr. Seuss Pick Up Lines. They will probably say: "Yuck!" 3. They took one look at the mileage on the first car and they said that these cars were all knackered. Well, I'd better hang around just in case. This living 'eLl. | Share this Matilda : I love it here! And . This child is a girl. MISS TRUNCHBULL grimaces as the purple spotlight leaves her. [walking out of the room excitedly] You gotta be loud! Hey, sleep with me.I am not scary.I'm really rich.I'm Drew Carey. Soundtracks, hands the car drill to Mikey, then walks to Matilda, after listing prices of cars bought and sold, he, Zinnia, and Mikey glance at the paper, then at Matilda, Harry takes his first look at Matilda, grunts, and leaves, Harry and Zinnia are leaving the hospital with the baby, mimicking Amanda with a high-pitched tone, everyone in the room except Miss Trunchbull and Miss Honey join in, strikes a desktop with her riding crop and all the children instantly face forward, whacks the desk again with her riding crop, Miss Trunchbull has accused Matilda of going into her house, grabbing and clenching Miss Honey's wrist very tightly in her fist, suddenly mad, she briskly releases her arm from Miss Trunchbull's grip with her free hand, Matilda comes home from school, excitedly. Zinnia Wormwood: Opening lines from children's books to capture new readers, to inspire writers, to reminisce with old favourites. . stream Where are you going? And it isn't wide enough to sit. [Miss Honey briefly nods yes as she leaves to rescue Matilda from the Chokey]. If you don't, I will get you. And you may sit and read while I teach the others, and, well, if you have any questions, I shall do my best to answer them. I've been trapped inside this (K) cage for ages, He'd call me bumblebee. 4. She re-enters carrying two square blocks, one larger than the other. We've curated this list of inspiring 'Matilda' quotes from the book and the movie. MATILDA Imagine what she is going to do to a horrible, squeaky little goblin like you, boy. Agatha Trunchbull: They were left out there for the whole world to see because you weren't here to take 'em in! Loud, loud, loud, loud! That such frequent miracles don't render each one un-miraculous? Agatha Trunchbull: RUDOLPHO Mrs Phelps? Harry Wormwood: . Narrator: DOCTOR Seven times two is fourteen. Here. Mrs. F-F-I. said the wife, smiling sadly and slipping her hand into his. Have to admit You are a crook. | This means that pick-up lines are all about first impressions. MATILDA pauses for several moments, holding the dolls in front of her contemplatively. [She pauses and realizes what she has done, and slowly lowers her hands.] Matilda: Please! Leave it alone, Jenny. The table stops and the hands hit the ground. You wouldn't listen. Just knock on the door . 4. 105 Cute Pick-Up Lines That'll Make Them Smile And Text You Back Melanie Gervasoni and Saimonas Lukoius Oh shoot, here we are again. Follow. Everything was arranged by [She pulls her coat over her head to simulate a hunchback, and grabs a large book.] They are all dressed in costume: Eric as Batman, Tommy as the Incredible Hulk, Lavender as a Princess, Nigel as Spiderman, Bruce in army gear, Amanda as Superwoman, Alice as Wonder Woman, Hortensia as a queen. BRUCE It was the biggest burp I had ever done. But if I try I can remember, It's the Trunchbull's speciality. I have the adoption papers. MISS HONEY Four times two is eight. And another door closes. [grabbing and clenching Miss Honey's wrist very tightly in her fist] MISS TRUNCHBULL strides to the board. Alternate Versions That is v . Yes, Miss Trunchbull. "Just when I catch my breath, you turn around and make me lose it again." Any woman would be flattered with a remark like this. . See you tomorrow! CHILDREN and COUPLES arrange themselves behind it. Matilda Wormwood! Because basically a sentence is just a big bunch of words. And if I couldn't teach, I'd have nothing at all. Hey, dip face. MR WORMWOOD Don't take me to Chokey! RD.com. Oh, it will only take a moment. I didn't do anything! Back before my life had ended, MISS TRUNCHBULL DOCTOR Are you a pig, Amanda? No! 2 0 obj It must be wonderful for a child to be so wanted. AAAAAHHHHH! Why, why, why, why, why, why, why? MISS TRUNCHBULL [after Matilda destroys the Wormwoods' TV with her powers] I wonder what Miss Trunchbull is afraid of. Four COUPLES, crouched down behind the table, begin to stand and speak. ], CHILDREN It's out of the question. so our main focus is on cute pickup lines, funny pick up lines, cheesy pick up lines, corny pickup lines, clever pickup lines, bad pick up lines, worst pick up lines, sweet pickup lines, and this list is . MRS WORMWOOD walks out from behind the curtain, heavily pregnant. Now, eat it. Could I speak to you for a moment, please? When you turn the corner, when you go to your cubbies to get your smelly coats, when you skip merrily to lunch, I'll be watching you, all of you, and especially you. See who wins. BRUCE turns back around and the scene unfreezes. Don't put honey on your brother. What? . See how they shine? But I shan't enjoy it, because of the despicable way in which you have spoken to me tonight. . You what? No, it's a library book! Absolutely, sir! I should be wearing in the semi-finals tonight! Chew your food; you're an animal! Good morning, children! "But we do not have the one thing in the world we want most.". A few! 2. And it was the most scrumptious cake in the entire world. . Michael: Did I drift off and dream for a minute or two? I will get you like you got me. She opens a book. The scene switches to the Wormwood's living room. "'The Burning Woman, Hurling Through the Air, with Dynamite in Her Hair, over Sharks and Spiky Objects, Caught By the Man Locked in a Cage', and it is the most dangerous feat ever known to man! Tess of the D'urbervilles . BIG KID [BEN] [to Michael, who is choking on a carrot Matilida shot at his mouth with her powers] And expensive, $9.25 for a bar of soap? BIG KIDS If you always take it on the chin and wear it, BRUCE google_ad_host="pub-6693688277674466"; ", MATILDA and the ACROBAT'S SISTER [off-stage] MISS TRUNCHBULL hurries over to AMANDA. Six times two is twelve. You can read words. Rules? front bottom. Merriam-Webster defines a "pick-up line" as "a prepared remark used by a person to start a conversation with a stranger they are interested in having a romantic relationship with". MATILDA Funny Pickup Lines Woman's Day Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again? google_color_link="000000"; . I did *not* glue my hat to my head! MATILDA, LAVENDER, and NIGEL raise their hands. Do you have a job? The reason the mileage is so high is a manufacturing mistake.". Now, can anyone read this? Oh, yes. How sweet. Twelve times two is twenty-four. And now she's after me! What about the Russians? Three judges hold up signs reading "10" as MRS WORMWOOD sits on the table. You have to stay inside the circle all the time. google_color_border="EDC7C2"; Doesn't mean that you just have to grin and bear it. It's . Are you going to tell me a story or not? . Once Agatha Trunchbull decides you're guilty, you're , BIG KID [TAMIKA] The DOCTOR, MR WORMWOOD, and a male nurse enter. That's why here I have compiled the sexiest and smart pick up lines to use on guys to make them interested in you! Matilda: Well, I'll pay you back, young lady. He dances with the hospital bed that MRS WORMWOOD is lying on. . Go on. But I'm a barrelina . I hope you know CPR, because you are taking my breath away. When all had quietened down, she stepped forward and produced . My daddy says I'm his special little . . MISS TRUNCHBULL Me, me, me, me. MISS TRUNCHBULL grabs AMANDA by the pigtails and swings her around and around. MR WORMWOOD Is a miracle! The audience gasped so loud that a passing aeroplane caught it on its instrumentation and recorded it as an atmospheric phenomenon. Matilda centers on Matilda, a young genius with telekinesis powers. Dad too. . MRS PHELPS The Invisible Man . Agatha Trunchbull: . . I don't know. Matilda: Snickerdoodle, what did you do to your hair? They're the bane of my life. What's this? The ESCAPOLOGIST starts to walk in from the back of the stage. Loud, loud, loud, loud! A little less flat, a lot more heel. What about the Bi-Annual International Amateur Salsa and Ballroom Dancing Championships? "It is called," said the husband, announcing the event to the world's press, who had gathered to listen with bated breath [The voice of the ESCAPOLOGIST echoes her words.] and astronauts! Agatha Trunchbull: Claiming that they know stuff we don't know. Thank you for suggesting it. Absolute silence. The CHILDREN and BIG KIDS hang their heads. BRUCE Matilda: MR WORMWOOD enters, puffing on a cigarette. Get out of it! From offstage, MISS TRUNCHBULL blows on her whistle. She hates it when I go out. You cannot see squat . Listen to this: "It was the best of times. [picks up two bowls of cereal] 1. He flails around the stage.] The dumber the act, the bigger the confession. The CHILDREN, save BRUCE, but including MISS HONEY, hide under the desks. 101 Weird & Best Pick Up Lines For Girls (Make Them Laugh!) All I can say is, thank heavens Michael has inherited his old man's brains, eh, son? She says they make me look pretty! Are you ready to get STICKY with MICKEY? Oh, Matilda! [turns to Michael] The sooner you're locked up in that school, the better. Narrator: Nothing will change. Jenny: MISS HONEY The condition is characterised by the sufferer experiencing bouts of chronic fatigue, and falling suddenly asleep, often without knowing, or any warning at all. Bye, Mrs Phelps! MRS WORMWOOD walks back behind the curtain. Life's a ball, so learn to throw it, % And if I couldn't teach, I'd have nothing at all. Why would you want green hair? Matilda: I stole the cake. Mr. Wormwood: Is there still time for the Bi-Annual Inter-Championship Amateur Sausage . There's a place you are sent if you haven't been good. They are all dressed in costume: Eric as Batman, Tommy as the . . The couples and the children overlap the next two verses, as children split themselves among five couples and execute rote choreography. MATILDA All right. We never thought it was possible, She holds the hat out to him. and look at reading. What do you want, Miss Chutney? As me. Chew your food; you're an animal! Harry Wormwood: Yourself, Matilda? You will soon (C) see there's no escaping trageDy. A contract is a contract is a contract! Might as well be saying you think that it's okay, Rudolpho! When a person is bad, that person has to be taught a lesson! Agatha Trunchbull, principal, Crunchem Hall Elementary School. Million $ Sticky Host: The room freezes as MISS TRUNCHBULL starts to write the word "GUILTY" on the board. Most parents believe their children are the most beautiful creatures ever to grace the planet. Some will only be really good at making Jell-O salad. [mimicking Amanda with a high-pitched tone] It's sweet and romantic, and it's doubtful she'll be able to resist your charm. Jenny : Quite the contrary. Good heavens. But I didn't . If they start to squeeeeze out of your ears, you're going to need help. Well I had to take a shower, Harry! Just you wait for phys-ed! Agatha Trunchbull: [He laughs.] The most precious gift the natural world can bestow upon us has been handed to you. Zinnia Wormwood: Of course they didn't believe me: I've got green hair! LAVENDER A beautiful, beautiful little girl. Just go back to school! If you want to throw the hammer for your country. . CHILDREN BIG KIDS approach and start climbing onto the gate and grabbing the CHILDREN from behind it. B-R-O-O-C-E! TOMMY Tomorrow at one? Between you and it, Upon the blackboard is written the alphabet. Oh, of course. Oh! Miss Honey: Mr. Wormwood: I shall consign you to the seventh circle of hell, child. . An audience cheers. This is one of the best pick up lines to use after you have hugged someone for the first time. Agatha, This is Magnus. But even you, Bruce, . Zinnia Wormwood: Amanda Thripp: Well? With a little help from us, she could go to university before she . Bunch of hippies and cesspool salesmen, ha ha ha ha Jenny: . Harry Wormwood: . Not the end of your nose. ALICE and HORTENSIA I think you'll want your trousers loose. Harry Wormwood: That makes me so happy. Best dirty pick-up lines 1. Stop me when this becomes true, but once upon a time, you and I went on a date. Harry Wormwood had unintentionally given his daughter the first practical advice she could use. Their furniture is wheeled off the stage and a hat rack with MR WORMWOOD's hat and an umbrella is brought center stage. "If I were a stop light I'd turn red every time you passed by, just so I could stare at you a bit longer.". Well? But she is a squib. More than one. The alphabet? Miss Honey, please don't let them Harry Wormwood: NIGEL Oh, yeah? 1. I really hope you have a search warrant. No one like a smart-mouthed girl like me. You really don't know anything, do you? WOMAN: She's just delightful. Matilda: "There's more than one Whomping Willow at Hogwarts, you know.". To unlock that power, all she had to do was practice. . . [She holds her hand out to MATILDA, who takes it.] MRS WORMWOOD . I can pretend I'm an . A storm can begin with the flap of a wing. And Jenny's outside. I don't know what you're talking about. Two times . Not a dot did I stray from the plot. I'm Lavender, and I think it's probably for the best if we're best friends! Agatha Trunchbull: Son, one day, you're gonna have to earn your own living. The boy's a looney. 6. . A shrimp. "It is our destiny ". MR WORMWOOD That's right, honey, look at mummy. My word is my law! Mustn't let a little thing like "little" stop you. And even if you put in heaps of effort, She has never seen a! CHILDREN So, Matilda. I'd love to meet her, actually . Yourself, Matilda? Auuurrrgh! MISS HONEY I'm not in favor of girls getting all clever-pants, Miss Hussy. A book? Harry Wormwood: Why? What is it? Matilda, isn't it? The biggest burp I had ever heard about! And people would come from miles around: kings! I . So, what is it? MRS WORMWOOD In a manner of speaking, yes.